How To Win Friends and Influence People

SIX WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU PRINCIPLE

• Become genuinely interested in other people.
• Smile.
• Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
• Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
• Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
• Make the other person feel important—and do it sincerely.

WIN PEOPLE TO YOUR WAY OF THINKING

• The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
• Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
• If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
• Begin in a friendly way.
• Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
• Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
• Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
• Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
• Appeal to the nobler motives.
• Dramatize your ideas.
• Throw down a challenge.

BE A LEADER

A leader’s job often includes changing your people’s attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:

• Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
• Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
• Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
• Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
• Let the other person save face.
• Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
• Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
• Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
• Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.